I don’t know how old Matin is. It’s really hard to guess people’s age here. They all look so young. And then when they’re old, you think, man, they look old! They’re lives are rough. They’ve been walking and hauling things and working these mountains their whole lives, and what 68 year old do you know who prefers a grass mat on the floor over at least a 2” foam mattress? He’s so bony and is so fragile. I imagine he’s oh, maybe in is late 60s or 70s? But I really have no idea.
Matin is our impatient right now. He got carried here by his family because he is having such a difficult time breathing. He looks a little barrel chested like he could have COPD. He has been a smoker for probably most of his life. His lungs are SO junky sounding. But he also has some signs of TB. There are a lot of possibilities. Our facility is limited though. He actually has a history of TB and has been on the meds before. That’s a lot of meds, TB meds. The other thing is that he’s got an enlarged prostate.
He gets so miserable sometimes. His shortness of breath comes in waves and it must be frightening to feel like he is suffocating, drowning and fighting so hard for breath. And how discouraging and painful to get such a full distended bladder and to not be able to empty it himself. And how embarrassing to get catheterized by female nurses in a culture where boys and girls don’t mingle very much. We don’t even assess men like we would in the states as a nurse, unless one of us were male.
He’s been through the medications before. He doesn’t want to go through it again. He’s tired. He would literally rather die. However, during his stay here, Joha especially has won over his heart. He grabs her hand and calls her daughter. But he’s been miserable the last couple days, and he said yesterday that he just wanted to go home. Knowing that he would die there, he had accepted, but he is so sweet. He said that he appreciated everything that we had done for him. He is truly grateful, but he doesn’t want to continue any more medication. He had taken medication for years and told us it was a waste of medicine, expense, and time for us. He appreciated us so much, he said, but he was ready to go home.
But the cool thing was when he said that, at the very end he said that maybe we could go visit him there sometime and pray with him. He is not a believer. It’s amazing how ripe of a time this is. This is a critical moment. So maybe he doesn’t have that much longer to live, but I think of in the Bible where Paul, in talking about our final victory states, “Oh death, where is your sting? Oh Hades, where is your victory?”
Can Matin know? Has he allowed the Holy Spirit to soften his heart to know that he can have peace in death and hope in salvaion? For about one week, all of the missionaries have been meeting together on a big rock that is by the clinic at 5:45am every morning for prayer together. We start with a song and then we pray and then sing one more song. He and his family have been at the clinic for just under a week, but have heard us and seen us every morning gathering together. He knows we are missionaries obviously and has had enough exposure over the years to know that we believe differently than the original native culture.
One day especially he was not doing very good. I think he was also discouraged. He wanted to go home. He can go home, we wouldn’t stop him, but we also can provide comfort care that he can’t get at home. What about when his bladder is so distended and painful and he needs to be catheterized? He understood that, and he is still at the clinic as I write this. He didn’t think he was going to make it one day. He sent for his family to come and be with him.
We have been praying for him so much this week. We have also talked to him about Jesus and the hope in Him. The opportunity is juicy ripe. I think it’s important for people to have a choice. To be presented with the 2 options, there are only 2, and to choose. And this old man, probably close to death needs the opportunity to make that choice. It is such priority. This is a life for eternity! This is not something we can just pray about and hope that he makes the right choice. We can do more by being an incredible support to him and his family and talking to him about the peace and the hope of salvation that we have in Christ. I know his heart has been touched. I pray that he opens his heart to the right decision. That death doesn’t have to be scary. That he can have a peace that passes all understanding and that peace will be a sign to him of the right choice. Maybe he’ll see the love of Christ through us and choose Him because of it.
Just because Matin is old and closer to death than some, doesn’t mean that he’s the only one at a critical point in life. We all are given 2 options, in which we will make a choice for one of them. It is highly critical that we look at the evidence and choose this day who we will serve. We are all at a critical time in our lives. What will our choice be? Life or death? “Choose life, that we might live… for the Lord is life.” Deut 30:19,20.
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